ADDICTION

Recently I was reading a book of Robin Sharma, The author best known for his Best seller "The monk  who sold his Ferrari"were He was giving an elaborate guide to develop good practices for a healthy and peaceful life.One of the aspect that drew my attention was a saying by him where he quotes that any activity that is practiced regularly for 21 days,becomes a habit and its very difficult to break that routine.
May be people who are into such activities and already addicted to something can throw more light on this statement,However I have been addicted to some thing in the recent past and i really find it difficult to quit. Wait .Wait,....just don't imagine, something extreme off late. I have been addicted to computer games and the reasons why I cannot quit can be seen as a real personal experience of our ego level.
Well I Really hated people,when sighted playing solitaire or free cell on the computer and often had a very low esteem on such people.Me on the other side would always try to play a game of chess on the computer(often feeling that it suited my intellectual mind)And as you all could guess I used to invariably lose the game against the computer,thou a loss would disturb me momentarily,I would console myself,saying, yeah this is natural. I am just Human and cannot rate my intelligence against a computer.
But repeated defeats,was really driving me mad,(I hope people know that I do not like to be a loser)So I wanted to try some thing much easier, which would boost my self confidence ,by giving me some winning streaks,having seen many people playing card games I was lured to try my luck on that.
 I started with the game of spider solitaire, and when I lost my first game I could not take the defeat as casually as that of the chess game.My ego was hurt terribly that I could not even play such a silly game of Cards,and it never occurred to me that ,here again my opponent was a computer.My rage was raising and I was doing nothing else but playing the game again and again,to register a win.,
This is when I  sympathized  with so many people who get addicted to gambling and other casino games,and indulge in playing again and again,losing huge money.
I understood that it was not the money lost,that  triggered  them to play again and again ,but the lost EGO,the I factor,the insult why i should lose in front of others,if any other person can win,than why not ME?
well this is when i recalled,the bad name earned by Dharuman in Mahabarath,inspite of being a Gem of a person ,righteous in all ways,the biggest blunder was He playing a game of Dice against SAGUNI(an expert computer) He could not perceive a loss as a loss in game but as a loss of his Ego,His successive attempts to play the game pitting his kingdom, brothers ,one by one and his wife as bids at last was not in an attempt to redeem,them one by one ,But just to establish his Ego and maintaining the I factor.
Well to my surprise I started,winning a few  card games.But now i found yet another component of my ego showing up,The score,each time I won a game,the statistic showed a top score as per that computer,well now I wanted to invariably,race that score(again the I factor)It was immaterial to me , who ever was the top scorer,It had to be ME.So  i started  playing the game, every single moment available,I was hooked on to the system playing the game,improving the score,I thought once I crossed the high score I would stop playing
(did i not say i hate people playing card games on the computer).I am the high scorer now ,but I cannot stop playing,because I want to beat my own record(Again the I factor)to see what can be the maximum limit to touch,set a score as high as possible, so that it is always ME,and none else.This is when I was again drifted into realistic life situations,Do we really see life in the real perspective as that of this game,if it was so we would never,give up so easily and settle down with our mediocre performance,in the various roles we do.How often do we want to surpass the financial targets assigned to us?How do we relate ourselves with our colleagues and other family members?How many times do we tell to ourself that I should be the Best person, AMONG ST every one here be it in terms of Character,intelligence,performance or Humane,Where does our dominant Ego,The I factor,hide when it comes to such relevant activities,which can take us to great heights.
Well not to Forget,off late,I am occasionally winning in the chess game too against the computer,which has given me an extra boost,persistent attempts,leads to success well Robin Sharma also says you have to put 10000 hours to master any activity,might be i am proceeding towards that,
 Don't forget success breeds success,and its highly contagious,keep highly sucessful people by your side, think and have the right attitude to win,"you will win"

WOMAN MANAGERS(Bosses)

Its really a matter of pride for all of us,to see woman,especially Indian woman occupying high positions and contributing their might in the progress and economical development of our country.Some may feel irritated, for me using the word, Indian woman and even felt whether it was meant to degrade them ,Not at all,It required a special Mention only because thou,our Ancestors and forefathers have assigned very high values on woman Equated them to Mother Earth,Bharath matha,and given us the status of the three important Goddesses around which, the whole world revolves the one for wealth lakshmi,the one for knowledge Saraswathi,and the other for courage and val our Sakthi.
we have been culturally tuned to donn the role of conservative woman.who have been   domesticated, and trained for bringing up the next generations and for looking after the house hold activities.
Revolutionary thinkers ( woman )did exist, during different eras,but their numbers were just a few ,with not any big Margins.
The transition of woman  taking part in jobs,were quite few in numbers and they much preferred to settle them selves with  jobs such as teaching,,Receptionists,Telephone operators And doctors,nurse  and clerical, where their roles were having limited level of comfort either feeling more comfortable communicating. with a group,which would not raise their voices because of the relationship   student-teacher,doctor-patient,boss-secy,Manager-clerk,further,it was a preconceived myth that woman,by and large,were not designed to hold managerial positions,since they lacked,Executive ability(the knack of getting work done),orderly minds(often wavering )emotional stability(chicken hearted)and leadership skills
But today round 35% of woman employed in various fields are holding Managerial and above positions,which is a remarkable feat,since 3 out of 10 are leading their teams of work force.
I have often wondered how comfortable  A man might feel,reporting  to lady managers and executing or getting orders issued by their lady bosses
But with the existing.stastics what is stated above,I think they have taken it with ease and the amount of conflicts and ego clashes that occur between a woman boss and a subordinate man is much less
compared to the issues that erupt between a lady boss and a lady subordinate.
I have observed men not grumbling about their bosses(lady)and in fact do not hesitate to discuss any work related problems and seek their advice.While on the contrary a lady reporting to a lady boss has more heart burn stress and ego clashes and her boss occupies her mental space both at office and at home.
This again made me to think on the issue and here are some of my personal idea.
The gender difference and safe guards that a lady has, invariably makes a man to deal with her in a very cautious way and he underplays his Macho card while in work.And is very alert not to de rate or demean her which would cost his job.
Further it is quite understandable that taking orders from a woman is no new thing for a man,Being brought up by a mother and growing up with his sibling sisters, he always feels it a pride to go with their orders/views/wishes(and at a later stage from his wife)and never feels it as a insult. So the conflicts are very rare.Have we ever heard a son in law ever having any issues with his mother in law never.......
Now on the other side,lets see how comfortable is a boss- subordinate relationship between two woman, awful,I should say  the first point of conflict arises,with a comparison on, intelligence looks,dressing,the amount of support or influence that they get from their men colleagues and  instead of carrying forward the job assigned to them and maintaining a healthy office atmosphere they get involved in conflicts on each issue an with inflated ego the tendency of refusing to execute any order or extending a note of appreciation becomes a rare occurance and the reason behind this if seen with an emotional angle would reveal that any lady would try to exhibit the in law syndrome(mother in law or sister in law)  disgust,mistrust and  view the other person only on that scale and hence the level of ease and capability of women gets crushed in this process.
So it   requires a real soul searching to be done by woman managers who excel excellently as a boss individually,but fall out miserably while ,handling her senior or junior woman colleagues.which requires to sheld away the personal injuries what is inflicted to her by the society and family.which remains as a ind-eligible scar very difficult to heal,giving rise to such interpersonal problems

CROSSWORD AND LIFE'S LESSONS

We are all born equal besides the major differences of gender,socio- economic conditions ,culture,etc,while some of us do have the best opportunities to enjoy and have all the adventures and treasures in life,some are not fortunate enough to even have a morsel of hot gruel,but would have had many experiences what the former can never even get..
Well how many of us can  spend some time observing the world around us,watch the few birds crippling,see the new flower bloomed in our pot,which is awaiting for our side look,and of course the daily news paper,which is never failed to be delivered.Leaving aside those colorful advertisements,which can spoil your day,not interested in the first few pages,where the life line of our county is debated,we conveniently skip to the last pages to scan on the sports session,even thou we know what it would carry,we do not want to miss staring at a photo which was already telecast n number of times on the TV well that's were our interest lies,what about the other entertainment stuff such as Sudoku,jumbles and crosswords,well many times, we avoid, attempting them for the following
we at times(many times) underestimate our intelligence,so guess it is for nerds
we do not have enough time to spend for such silly activities,where we have to crush our brains
 we may have attempted once or twice and then resigned to the proverb.once bitten twice shy.
I also fall into one of the category or all of them,so many times skipped these items without any attempts.
It was a Sunday,after,making sure that there's nothing more to read or stare at i had flung the news paper,on the cot.My daughter who is normal ally a late riser on Sunday grabbed the paper and unfortunately started putting her hands on the crossword puzzle,suddenly solving crossword, which was till than rated as a useless stuff became very important to me (I had to establish that I was better or at least as smart as my daughter) WE ALWAYS WANT TO FIGHT BATTLES WITH WEAK OPPONENTS AND CLAIM THEM AS GREAT VICTORIES!!  So now both of us were using our synergy to complete the blocks.
SO far so good, we could see that we were filling up boxes and the once plane boxes were now filled with some alphabets,having exhausted our ability,we resigned that nothing further could be done and gave up,and started doing other activities of the day,however the unfinished crossword was lingering on the backdrop And every time I happened to see that paper again,I started scanning the clues, whether I can crack some and to my surprise I found that different words were opening up at various point of time.And at some point I was almost amazed to see that 90% of the puzzle was filled.

 which made me happy and also made me to draw some conclusions analogous to life

Many times we never venture into new activities,be it sports/business/hobby ,or studies,
fearing that we may not have the required knowledge or skill,by giving a try nothing is lost,we may not get 100% results in the first trial,but we may see that with persistent efforts may hit the Targets

Life too poses us with different problems and might be we would really knot know where to start or which to do first,lets us start the process from what ever we know and by solving three known problems,you will find the fourth one is already solved.

When we give a little time  and relook at the problem,new perspective and new ideas flip from some where,which means the solutions are hidden ,some where within us,with the right type of probing we can unearth them.
Well after spending considerable time solving them,I just scrolled down a bit further,where I found the printing,"ANSWERS TO THIS CROSSWORD AT PAGE ...,WHICH WAS JUST THE REVERSE OF THE PRESENT PAGE"

It gave a momentary relief,because I could rate myself, whether,I had done the job correctly,But at the same time the thrill of solving the crossword was lost,Because your other side of the brain was always chattering and saying why make guesses?why should you be thinking so much?its a easy way out,turn the page and confirm.Why waste your time and energy? AND also reminded what a drab life can be if we had ready made solutions to every thing.Because,  we  lose interest in any object or person or A relationship,the moment we posses it or if we are sure to find it.
Very beautifully penned by kavingar Kannadasan,  "KANNUKU AZAGHU ETHUVARAI KAYIL KEDAIKUM NAAL VARAI"(worth/ value/charm or importance of any object or person is felt,only till such time that its not possed by you).
So life is made interesting not by having everything that we want,But by earnestly making efforts to get what we want,ant still having a big wishlist to chase and Achieve,which should be a continious process....Making life much memorable and challenging

WE REAP WHAT WE SOW

God cannot be present everywhere and that’s why he made  Mothers, this is an adage that exist even today and I think is followed to a certain extent ,only till such time that we are independent and are on our own. And parents become useless,nagging,and an mere punching bag to us,for all our problems.

Remember the days of our growing up, Mothers were the only soul who stood by us taking all insults and bashing, protecting us from whatever small or big trouble,basking us with praise that we are their treasure and we would defenitely be a pillar of support on whom they can lean in their old age.
Above all, recall how possessive she was /is that she ever believes that her son/daughter CAN NEVER be on the side of injustice.or can never be wrong 

Recall the days when mothers rush to the neighbors/schools/shops etc when something is uttered about their child and so confidently argue, saying you say a thousand thing about my child ,but I know what my child is ,and I believe he/she would not do or act like this.
 Well how many of us give the same credit to our Mother/Father  AND SAY a loud, You say a thousand things about my Mom/Dad, I know about her/him, They are not capable of saying or doing it? Well we would have definitely said like this and stood by them, only till such time that we got married, Because we have passed over the right of certifying our Parents character to our spouses, and at a later stage to our kids

Why? and what make us to erase all the goodness what we received at their behest and throw them and treat them more shabbily than a beggar?

Is it that the feeling of taking care of them once they becomes a dependent on us is seen as a big burden  and as a preventive step we want to keep them away?

Why are we losing our rational thinking process and judgmental powers, which we are so good at when we deal officially,  and so biased when we deal with our parents?

Why  are we not even giving them the minimum respect and love what we are generous to show towards, dogs and  cats, which we deny them.

When we know that every coin has two faces and every part of the story has two narrations, why does it so happen that, the Narration given about our mother/parents  is always true and we pass on the judgment, so very instantaneously, abusing them and accusing them for everything on earth, right from the mistake of bring us to this blessed world .

Well I am remained about a old  widowed lady, who stayed, our next  door, She would have been at least in her seventies, with wrinkled skin covering her skeleton, draped in a 9 yard faded cotton sari blouse less, who was a dependent on her lone son who was supporting his big family. After inheriting his father’s job. The lady was never allowed to enter the house, and her living was mostly restricted to the last door step of their house.

We had never seen her treated with food ,clothing or shelter, But she had a sense of responsibility that as dawn broke, she would set off with a broken bamboo basket to collect cow  dung  that’s littered by stray cows and Buffalo's,

Once the collection was copious she would set off to convert them into cow dung cakes to meet the fuel requirements of the house. So she never wanted to lead a life of uselessness, but her presence or existence was never acknowledged by her son, daughter in law or grand children. She never had a daughter and I don’t know whether life would have been better had she had one or it would have been more horrible

Only rarely when she was either sick or under distress, she would keep Wailing softly calling  out her son’s name or that of her grand children, for a glass of water or coffee. Her son who was naturally hard of hearing, never responded to her cries or might be( he was  turning a deaf ear, as many of us do)She would be encountered by a rude shock, when one of her grandson would emerge and give her two kicks at her butt, and yell Aye Kezavi(old lady)  can’t you keep quite. Why the hell are you wailing?

Pain, topped with humiliation would silence the old lady, who would return to her spot of cow dung heap to be dried in the sun along with the  dung.

What surprised us than, was the silence and non intervention of her son, who never questioned any one for treating his mother so badly , .The man never had any misunderstanding or discord with his family towards, such a shabby treatment meted out to his Mother. We knew that old lady was given a raw deal .and We  IMAGINED OR WOWED THAT our mother/parent would never come across such a situation, FOR WE WERE GOOD CHILDREN AND OUR MOTHER WAS BRINGING US UP WITH VALUES.

Well we have up kept  this principle, only till such time that we did not have  a family of our own, and this Anathema of mistrust and ill treating has become a norm in every family(if any one screams and say no I do not fall in this category, He or she would be the biggest hypocrite).

We really do not  know when this genesis  has sprouted to treat our own people so were shabbily and  clue less about how this anemia can be rooted  out,Any way let us stand by the principle Every body’s  Dignity is to be given due respect, when we cannot give our Parents dignity to live, Let us atleast extend the courtesy of allowing them to die in peace

After all every child/son/daughter, daughter in law  today are either fathers and mother now or are going to be  Fathers and Mothers of tomorrow, Awaiting to be served with the same serving and to  reap what  we have sowed

80/20 principle

I am(rather we are) listening,hearing ,seeing ,reading various topics that are discussed day in and day out,FDI in retail,Economical slowdown,Recession,Revival of economy, Private- Public partnership,Scams, Democratic /economic reforms ,Revolutions and public out  cry on the States policy,Heated debates are going on ,On methods of improving one of these issues or to introduce methods to implement some or all of these measures so that life of ordinary man will flourish?Government would have had the satisfaction of having met? The aspiration of people who have elected them(aam- aadmi), The country would become one amongst economically strong Nation.
Well even though, these are never ending Businesses, what the government has to execute. and I have nothing else  to do but just thinking and sinking in my thoughts, looking out of my car window ,while I had a drive of Around 200 kms to see my parents and  was returning  back,what caught my attention,were besides the array of houses and a few organised work establishments,the entire stretch was occupied with small vendors,selling petty items, ranging from scissors,handkerchiefs,fish,flowers,garments,furniture,repair workshops,etc,etc on the pavements,slightly bigger ones  (only because they were housed in a 5/5 or 5/10 shops)  doing similar business,druggist,cell pone accessories,motor spare parts,stationary stores,fancy stores  mutton stalls  etc,
and yet bigger establishments of textiles/eateries etc,but the presence of all commodities crisis, cross were interesting and also evoked some soul searching questions?
Can we say that this is the group that has been orphaned by both private, including the government in enabling them get a sustained  income by means of providing a job?

Can we say that this is a group of individual ,who are self content(because i couldn't see them doing huge business)with what ever they earn, which has made them,stick on with these establishments as their livelihood,even thou it might be a hand to mouth existence

Can we say that these people are more confident and sure that, a government job or a Permanent fixed income is not necessary to support them and have ignored the presence of such institutions of support.

Can we say that they have resigned to the awkward destiny of their fate that they have decided to live in this penury,for generations to come.

Can we say that this is a group of incorrigible people who believe they can never accept a boss over them and are happy bossing them selves Knowing that the Government is not for them or their welfare

Well while extrapolating these groups and plotting the normal office goes.in private as well as government establishment,revealed that they were falling into a preconceived pattern of 80/20 principle.

Well it was in theyear 1906 sir,Vilfredo Pareto the renowned economist,established a set pattern which is applied worldwide that fits into this distribution.for example,we spend 80%of our day doing unimportant things and do qualitative things only 20% of the day.
In factories/office /household,its 20%of population which helps completing 80%of the out put,while 20%is responsible for 80% of output.
In a class you may find 20%of the students falling in the group of Nerds and the remaining 80% being Average performers.
Even in our thought process we spend 80%of our energy worrying about trivial issues,while 20 %is spent on important  issue.
 The principle of Pareto is widely used in Manufacturing and other establishments This is one of the reason that if we do A 20% Quality check on finished goods where we are sure of meeting 80% of the possible defects and certify that 100% checks are done
So also in organisations 20% of posts are managerial ,while 80%goes down below,well are you people guessing why I have travelled away from  my thought process?
 Well its these 80%of people who are employed in such unorganized sectors, who have elected  This Government(who never seem to get  cared by it) and who hardly contribute 20% towards its Economy. While the Government works to ensure the safety and stability of 20%of the people who hold the key for 80% of economical growth,who have grabbed all Major infrastructures, that's the Reason,why all policy of the Govt have very little impact on the common man,cause he is not the target population for reforms.
Here too the reforms are skewed 20% towards,the below poverty line,who are the 80% of vote bank80% of reforms for the 20%population holding major industries,because 80%of funding to run elections are to come from them
well if we stretch this concept of  80/20,Principle, we might find that it would occupy all Areas,yes before I conclude,even though our brain which is so small hardly weighing less than 500 gms,takes 20%of the blood circulation of our system and controls 80%of our Activity.So scheduling our priorities accordingly would make our life more easier

ARAKKONAM

 Arakkonam the topic of my blog would have ringed strange in our ears,if it had been written a few months back.But n0w it has already gained popularity,due to a Movie,that is slated for release
I would really like to complement the Director(who is still unknown ) ,for having chosen this title for his movie to be released shortly, I was just listening to an Advertisement about this movie. and grew intrested
 for the simple reason that Arakkonam has been  my adopted home town that's been familiar for me for  a few decades.
Arakkonam by itself has under gone a lot of change right from its name logy of ARKONAM (TAUGHT  to pronounce as ahkonam,by my primary anglo teachers) to Arakkonam,besides increasing its schools from a handy 4 to around 50 and also having a dozen colleges,while we had to depend on Chennai or kanceepuram for our Continuation beyond schooling's.
Arakkomam is neither a small village nor a big city ,but defined as a town and has an inhabitant varying between 1 to 1.3 lakhs, Of course its well connected by rail and road, Around 70 kms from Chennai Is
 the mid point for the famous temples of Tirrutanni/Kancepuram/Sholingur,Has had an air field in 1942 used during world war II,Occupies a Place in history, since this is the place to have had third rail route put up and run,between madras and Arakkonam.Has a place called Thakkolam,which was the battlefield used by the Cholas/pallavas and currently has the honor of having the largest military runway in Asia "Rajali "naval air base  Not a highly literate place,but has been a hub supporting students, from near by villages,and with schools of good repute, which was attended by our President of INDIA sh RADA KRISHNAN , ,and the first school run by anglo Indians ,for Railways in the country. With a sizesable settlement of Anglo Indians .
Had a small Industrial complex,comprising 7 to 8 workshops.One of the main source of employement for many was/ is the Railway work shop ,Ramco Cements .And  the steel plant. Arakkonam junction(Railway station )has been used by film makers on a few occassion,might be because  of lesser traffic ordeals.
Well I guess this  intro on Arakkonam would suffice for any stranger,who wants to have a demographic idea about the place and does not have any thing quite unique to recall,other than being very near and accessible to the Great Metro city Chennai.
Well,my curiosity is increasing to know what can be the story line/plot of this Movie, Does it Begin in  Arakkonam and end in Arakkonam,Well,who can be that lucky subject  for  this film, or what can be the incident around which the story line is entwined with.
Does it describe one of those romantic love stories that travel from Arakkonam to chennai by Jolarpettai express and end with a happy ending/or otherwise

Is it about the intresting travel time of one hour between chennai toArakkonam and back by the same train,were you can really have a demonstrative class on time management,where lessons are read,  home works completed,hair dried and platted,the ladies have their final touches of make up before alighting,busy office goers skillfully chopping the vegetables required for cooking for their morning pack ups,skillfully,making malas of jasmine, while a word by word narration on either the naughty boss or troublesome supervisor goes on or a more descriptive narration of the difference of opinion what prevails bet ween her and her husband is narrated to her yet to be married freind,who starts giving her inexperienced expert coments of handling the situation.OR A silly fight which starts as a word of exchange for adjusting and leavinge a small place to accomodate his wife or kid on the already crampped seat, which carries on till you reach the last destination,  OR a day to  day account on the town entouring all the govt/private establishments and giving a count by count of the story and the life style of the people their,
Is it going to talk about a suddenly sprung rich contractor ,who ultimately died alone when all his money was gone and left to be cremenated in a shabby way.
Will it talk about the educated Freindship that still exists between the educated friend and his street pal, who sits selling corriander inthe bazaar,
Does it have a police officer,who once tried  to reform,the place with his reforms
or has the usual narration of two groups of rivalry that end up  attacking each other and killing themselves

Does it have the goresome incident, when a tanker load of petrol was on fire on the tracks,which exploded,causing people in far flung villages too to sit out a full night,not knowing what would follow next.

Will  it talk about the well dressed and angloised indians,their culture and their extinct.?
Would it talk about a full day within the campus of the naval air base and the quality life of the military persons?
Would it talk about the rise and fall of congress party, which was launched by our former Prime minister Mrs Gandhi personally,and the heros who stood by her.?
Will it have the never repaired subway and the newly constructed court which would remain as land marks describe Arakkonam,or will  it gives an account about the once huge lakes and water bodies and the catch of fishes which strived as a business ,which is no more.
well I have such questions being asked, and would really like to see through ,which window the Director of the Movie has tried to show Arakkonam to a Larger population,which knows nothing more about this small town besides being a Major Railway junction,where you are sure that the train would stop,for you to refresh yourself with a magazine and snacks.And meet the request of your nagging son or spouse,who had wanted some thing on their long journey,where you would have promised let Arakkonam come.

OWNERS PRIDE-NEIGHBOURS ENVY

I hope by now many of us would have forgotten,these numbers   38  27  23 and 0 2  4(its definetily not some telephone no or a winning lottery no or the size of any of our celebrity).It is the final tally of Medals won by China our neighbouring country in the order of gold ,silver,and bronze  and the adjoining numbers is that of our Mother land
well there is nothing to accuse  us,if we have forgotten, because,in our busy life  wth problems galore it is quite understandable, that we could give only a partly  attention  to these events and than switch over to much presenting situations and events drawing our attention.
well I was reminded about our fantastic(?)performance in the Olympics 2012. At least half the population of our country are enthralled by the pride of we bagging six medals.Lets not belittle our Hero's ,who have saved our pride they deserve our praise and recognition,But our neighboring country having and sharing all similar strength and weakness as ours showed a mighty performance,which we can match only in our dreams.(perhaps recall a advertisement where a small boy comes and says amma i came 2nd in the running race, where the mother is thrilled and treats him with sweets,while the father asks how many people participated and the boy will say 2)
While some news channels were discreetly discussing about our dismal performance in the OLYMPICS and as usual,doing a postmortem for the probable reasons for our poor show.(WE are always ready to fix responsibility after allowing mistakes to happen)
Well, the reasons what were attributed were quite genuine and  acceptable,like
i)We are capable to prove some thing as an individual,but fail collectively,when we are a team,very
true,because all the six medals  what came through was only in individual events (A typical Indian crab scene)
2)The next argument that was placed were regarding ,not having the backing of good coaches,because we are not prepared to give them the right kind of re-numerations,And the coaches in turn do not have the required motivation and drive to achieve desired results
well this again can be accepted,because we are over cautious in extending a penny more ,when it comes to some one else .As we are bread with a lot of conservative ideas.
The next in line was that
3)There is no real seriousness in the selection process,which is not transparent,which is more skewed and laced with discretion and nepotism,where by the just and talented lot are not considered,while people with lesser talents find their way."Very true"we can see this even in small ,small selection process,so cannot be ruled out.
But after  these soul searching facts, are we going to overcome these hurdles and put a brave
face in the forth coming Olympics" NO" Why?Because these are very minor things for us to feel
ashamed of,"After all we do not process  the gene of sucess and victory"

I know there may be a cry of denial that this is a very generalistic statement and we as individuals are far superior and quite sucessful,but if we believe that as per darwins theory we are the decendents of our fore fathers,we will agree that ours was the only country that has been  invaded
and ruled by kings of different clans,from the Portugese,French, Britisher,Mugals(persians)
and than the different dynasty's kanishka, Gupta, Ashoka .etc. ect ,which means we are capable of surrendering without a fight or its in our blood that we underestimate the strength of our opponents or we never prepare ourself fot the inevitable,which is carried forward, or not enhancing our skills in tune with our opponents and that's why I said we do not contain the winning gene.

Well leaving these things,how many of us have really seen a Hockey stick in its physical form,
After all it is our National game.To be very frank I have seen them only on the silver screen(cinema).Many times for the wrong reason ,as a handy weapon used by villians in movies.And for once with a positive note in Chakde india.Why is it that we have not really cared about this game?Is it too complicated than cricket and tennis? well I have no answers but only feel its time that we choose some other game in which we have a edge and declare it as our National game.So that atleast we would be proud to put our heads High with winning a gold in our "national game.'"
While just musing over this I was intrested to know what are the sports accessories I have at home
well I  could sight two table tennis raquets a few batamintion bats a few shuttle cock,a volley ball
and a tenni coit ,well these are there even thou there no serious sports person at home.and I an sure that many houses would definetly have a cricket bat,stumps,pads and ball(after all its a pride to play cricket) or at least to identify our self with cricket But note that no house sports a hockey stick, even for monumental reasons,just for the sake that its a OUR NATIONAL GAME.So with this back ground when are we going to get a gold  in Olympics? for our National game.The only thing that can happen would be that Hockey is scraped from the list of games hosted and some thing else subsitute.as our national came.
When I was stormed with such mixed feelings of helpless- ness I was just viewing yet another TV programme,were a guest dignitary is posted with a question by the host ,which is the favourite game that you play ?  well I was eager to know the response and was shocked ,when She said" Diamond rush" MIGHT BE ON HER MOBILE OR I PHONE.so ultimately now  OUR ATTITUDE towards games has been  restricted to a few  movements of our nimble fingers,so why dream  about a huge rally of medals, lets always be the envious neighbor and leave the pride for others





   

Public speaking_AN ART

Many of us have experience this feeling of discomfort occasionally or as often as possible,we rarely felt at  ease over it, right from our child hood.Recall  our teacher called us to either read out a paragraph aloud in the class or asked us to answer a question or recite a poem.The moment that we are made to stand up and say some thing, invariably many of us barring a few  would have experienced,cold hands,trembling legs dried vocal cords and either stammered out the answers fumbling many times, if it was a question,read out in a monologue skipping words and sentences in fear if it was a reading test or hissed out under our breath croaking out some ineligible soundsif it was some response.
This physological fear has continued to dominate  us even today.The Most disguting part of any meeting is the Self introduction  portion,Many times I have even noticed people forgetting their names .We sit in  important meetings intently attending and acknowledging what ever is being told,but the moment a question is Raised asking about our comments or feedback, we rarely express our-self, in spite of having all the data in hand,ever imagined what could be the reason. well, its quoted that Next to death,the second feared item for any human is public speaking.
 We always admire people who can speak out spontaneously and wonder where from they have been gifted with this special talent(of course we often forget that we too have this in our blood,have we ever lost any of our quarrels/arguments with your spouse,parents,mother in law etc etc,where you just get all the vocabulary that you have never used in a free flow,amazed at your power of rememberance ,cause you can quote every instance of injustice or annoyance that you met with, How many Examples and quotes we are capable of throwing out) But why do we fail when it comes to saying a few words in public,  in front of a select group of audience.
Speakers also have their share of apathy,while we listen to some speakers intently and  want them to go on you may find them winding up.and in some other occasions,we may just keep waiting for the speaker to say those last words of conclusion amidst of booeing and claps to bid them an early exit.If we make a crisp analysis it may turn out that not all successful people are good speakers.But invariably all goods speakers have been real success in their chosen paths of progression

If we dole on the the essential attributes that makes anyone a better speaker.,the first and fore most maybe the content and information what is to be discussed.
INTERESTING:Every one of us would agree that we are really impressed with an interesting talk rather than an intelligent speech,and to make any content interesting it has to be laced with good anecdotes and topped with good humour,, just to recall all of us enjoyed the pattimandram speech of 5 minutes, better than the long drawn speeches on our Independence day. And the reasons can be guessed by all.The earlier speech was instantaneous,it had originality,and entwined with emotions. The later was a pre prepared speech,which depended more on the type of delivery,and was made flat by the speakers for lack of emotion and a bad preperation
We cannot set aside that all political speeches are monotonic,we should not forget that only with this single weapon of such inspiring and power packed speeches, the people have identified their leaders,not to miss Abraham Lincon, Mahatma Gandhi, Winston Churchill and WHO ARE STILL looked up with great respect for their prowess on public speaking,which were inspiring,motivating and had very strong messages to be carried forth.
When we were young we have heard our neighbours or parents commenting,வாய்  உள்ள பிள்ளை   பீழைத்து  கொள்ளும் (A child with speaking skills will survive all odds)And that looks a reality that of late the best paid people are motivational speaker, politicians, radio jockeys,news analysts and those umpteen number of consultants and religious spiritual gurus, who are capable of selling any thing thro their uninterrupted speech.
So lets not fear any more to speak out what we can with courage and with out any inhibitions, After all practice makes perfect so we can also be one among the good speakers

. 

IN SEARCH OFF.......

My day is not complete,without this activity ,Its as routine a thing as I wake up,brush my  teeth, Do my hair,visit the grocery.etc.etc.well I know that you would  not have zeroed in on it.
well for me a day is not complete without this activity."Me searching in vain for a item thats presumed  lost".(while it most probably would have been misplaced).
If you are one of those persons,whose is quite syestamatic and well groomed,would exclaim how very silly for a person to be so careless,who cant take care of such trivial things?
Well you would be amazed if I tell you that I  lose (misplace) things only because I  want them to be safe and in my continuous monitor where they are I shift them to safer spots??  AND FORGET WHERE IT LANDED ULTIMATELY ending with Me searching for some thing every day.
There are days  when I switch off and go to bed and suddenly remember some thing and sit up and search.when it comes to what are the items I search, it varies,right from a safety pin to a precious jewel and the efforts what I put in for both the items  are the same.
God only knows how  even a printed receipt of no value. becomes precious the moment I come to know that it is missing.
Even thou the activity of searching is labourious and painful, these are the moments which makes my day,For I am sure that at the end of this activity  I  will end up finding  some thing else which evaded my search earlier .well these are the instances when I come across items of memories,
I go around searching for a guarantee card  and land up with a bunch of letters written by my loved ones so the guarantee card takes a second least priority and I sit down with the letters and start reading them one after the other  relating myself to the days and moments,so many flash backs and short films unroll and I give up my search for the guarantee card,well for the day my quota to search has ended with good reminiscent.
Next day suddenly I remember that I have to take stock of some of my accessories and now i am in the midst of all items spurn around me, but the accessories kit is no where to be seen, while i have located the guarantee card and of course fumbled on one of my favorite Music /CD and now the urge to listen to it has put my searching spree to a back seat,
like this there are many items of interest in our possession, but we never bothered to spend time with, which shows up in a search,A old photo album, A Book from your favorite author,A gift from you small kid,A card from your son/daughter.A dress that you dont fit into but which was presented by your dad for your birth day,A report card of your young  days,which you scared to see,which made you to smile now.Like this we unravel so many small ,small happiness in this process of searching,which ultimately makes" MY day" even thou the worry about that missed item still lingers.
Well the most recent Search,which I  am involved in is for a nail cutter,the moment I saw my nails,I could'nt resist the urge that it requires a trimming and once this feeling sets in,I can do nothing else and my whole energy is focused only on cutting the nails and good heavens I cant find it, well the search continued with different outcomes,but not the nail cutter,so having given up on it today I was on a search for my pen,losing pens is my hobby,bu ETC..but some thing told me that even if I dont succeed in finding my red pen.I would find the nail cutter,Very true I am holding the nail cutter .SO hope to get the pen some other day, while I search for some thing else.
With my endless PATIENCE for searching I have understood the following
Search makes your Monotonous life lively
Search helps you to remember  the little happiness,which you deserve
Every search results in getting more lost items
You only lose some thing,when you give up your search
You really do not know what is its worth unless you have lost it
so putting it back into the known adage ,KNOCK it will open.
ask you will get,Search you will find
And lastly lets not restrict our search to worldly things but also  the GOD within us,Which Iam sure that we will find if the search is not given up.

THE CHAIR

Every party,sport event,or get together normally never misses to include this item for entertaining the guests,some times for the kids,some times for the ladies who often shy away from participating and of-course at times for the Male folks too.

Well you would have guessed it its none other than the Musical chair,where the participants have to constantly aim to target a chair to sit while the scoring music abruptly stops,the game becomes more critical in the final rounds where you really have to grab the last one,always eyeing on it and if warrants by dislodging the opponent and some how get seated.and the finalist always has that pride of winning the game.

well I was never comfortable playing this game or should I say never played for two reasons

1)I could not take failures lightly even when it is a game

2I would always like to play a fair game so I may not dislodge the finalist and grab the chair,which was my weakness.

But nowI wonder ,why wasthe game coined with a chair,why the same game could not be associated,with any other item,well I can now visualise that a chair is A very important item in the life of every one,it gives a standing in the society,and to occupy a chair you have to struggle a lot,once occupied it gives you comfort,respect, power,and what not,that we get so much attached to it that we start making all types of compromises to ensure that we are not deseated.

History,tells us that many a battle were fought just to occupy the throne,

The great epic Ramayana,would not have existed it Rama was throne d as the king,

And today,we may not be seeing so much of disturbances personally within ourselves and politically within the Nation had there not been a article as a CHAIR.

beyond the desire for a particular chair,now the craving has got extended to who will sit next to whom,will I be at the head of the table or left at the trailing end,unnoticed and insignificant.

Having given this intro let us not decide that THE CRAZE for a chair exists only in official or political, hereditary issues.We in our every day life have some places earmarked within our houses as our favourite spots,which we do not want to give away to others,the moment you enter your house I AM sure each one of us would go and occupy the same position day after day subconsciously,and we are at times so very demanding that if some one is already seated there,we don't mind to vacate them and slump down into it.

The moment that a room is allocated to you in your hostel, you make sure which would be your chair and table.

Go to a cinema,get a ticket the first thing you notice is your seat number.

Beyond this i still remember an easy chair which was my dads favourite chair,he used to tell us that we should not use it because it means we are demeaning the respect for him.But invariably,we used to wait for him to leave the house and our fight to occupy it would begin and end with at least 3 to four of us lined up one behind the other,And it always gave you an extra pride when you were occupying a seat which is not yours,or not meant for you.

So no wonder that once there is a vacant chair ,the row begins to occupy it and at times we see that the only thing that has not changed in history is the never ending skirmish that keeps going on in our desire FOR a chair be it POWERED or DUMMY.

Hence forth lets encourage our kids to play the musical chair game with earnest efforts, If required have some special coaching arranged, and tutored so that they learn all the nuances of grabbing a chair first, to push out people and still have a chair for themselves,always to be watchful so that what they are not deseated,and to ensure that they garner all the energy required to hop from one chair of power to another by hook or crook,so that they remain in chair for ever

SOME POSITIVE VIBES

Most of us including me are riding on a bumpy wave of crest,and fall and cursing our self for the good riddance,happening in our daily life,we are under a fear ,what if life will remain like this forever, in
the days to come,and disgusted with this life .But seeing it relatively,we will understand that only because we experienced good days,we are comparatively feeling that the present day is bad or worse and today's worst day might change into a better day tomorrow,so lets take life as it comes.
Well driven with-such NEGATIVE THOUGHTS,which has converted into a deep set depression ,
In self recovery mode wanting some diversion,I turned my attention towards ,some motivational books and was reading Norman Peale on the Positive thinking

I just thought I would share a small recap from what i read,Norman Peale,once met his best friend ,who was a successful business man at 56 and was shocked to see him grow so old in such a short span the man was,looking sad,depressed and out of life,Peale with all concern asked him what was the matter for this drastic change in look,The Gentleman almost broke down and said "I have lost every thing,what ever I earned has just gone leaving me with nothing to look back'

Peale wanted to give him some confidence and put him back on the track,so after talking to him for some time,He asked his friend, that we can take stock of the value of assets whats left back,so that we can carry forward,so picked up a paper and started jotting down the responses

Are you married?

Oh yeah i am married for the last 30 years,and my wife is such a wonderful person,that she has been a source of support and inspiration to me

Children?

Am blessed with three boys,each of them a gem,they have reassured me that they love me and would stand by me always.

Do you have any friends?

Yes a bunch of them who have voluntaries and said they are ready to give a helping hand in any form

Have you done anything wrong?

Oh no i am a person of Integrity and honour,so i dare not to do any unethical things

Do you have any ailments?

No no I am quite healthy and fit

Whats your belief quotient on GOD

Oh,only because i believe in god and know He helps me,I could take this beating,

Now Peale turned the paper towards him where he had listed

A Loving wife,supportive sons,helpful Friends,high integrity,good health,God fearing
and said looks you have not lost every thing as you told me in the beginning you are still rich with these assets which will help you build up what you have lost.The man too realised that he still had the best things with him which would give him a come back.

Well it is the same with us too,many times we are bogged down with our small troubles lose our confidence and start retreating,never to make an assessment on what we have.

So all folks who are sharing a similar emotion as that of mine,just Believe that with Gods power flowing trough and When "GOD IS WITH US NO ONE CAN BE AGAINST US,"


 

The clutch

We find our self attached to certain,objects person,job,books characters, habits and giving them up becomes very difficult .  we find our self glued to these situations and persons that we almost become blind folded, that even when some thing better is offered we are scared to take them up,for the unknown fear, whether we will get the same type of comfort,doubting our capabilities and luck, recently
Enthused to give a try on the wheels,I enrolled myself in a driving School,My class started
with me asked to sit erect(never done)and to have my hands positioned on the steering wheel with a 180 degree  horizontal angle between both hands,AND THE NEXT intro was for the ABC,IN reverse order(C clutch,B- brake and A- accelerator,The class started with my first instruction to apply pressure to the clutch and to release it,slowly,IN due course of time i understood that unless the clutch is released the vehicle will not move either forward or backwards,in other words unless we get ouself released from the clutches,with ,what ever we are hooked to our growth and development is not going to happen and we may be stagnant  remain where we are..
once there lived a pair of parrots on a, banyan tree in a forest,suddenly there was a very heavy storm and the branches of the tree started to sway randomly ,the parrots,who were taken aback by this sudden storm,lost their balance,in an attempt to save themselves,they caught hold of a twig on the branch, with their beaks,and were literally hanging and swaying along with the force of the wind, this way and that way.
Gradually,the storm had ceased and normalcy restored,however the parrots stayed perched to the twig.A man who was passing by saw the difficulty  the parrots,were under going and suggested that the leave the branch,but the parrots refused,saying they might fall, the learned man said,you just leave your clutch, you will find out that you will not fall ,down but can fly away to a different place,only than did the birds realise that they were gifted with wings and whatever the man says is true,and got themselves released for a wonderful flight.
Well can we not identify our self with these parrots, who are adamant with certain fixed ideas
We,refuse to change schools,for the fear of losing friends
Hesitant to shift your house,scaring that you might loose your social contacts and neighbours

Undecided to take up new jobs,for the uncertainty of landing with a bad boss(any way finding a good boss is rarity)

Not prepared for transfers and shifts doubting whether you would get all facilities,what you have enjoyed here.so  goes the list,
 people under the clutches of their wife,some under the clutches of their father,mother, friends,husband ,under the addiction to some thing  under the influence of some ,Guruji,samiyar,boss......and always finding life as tiresome and dreadful, unable to Get released ,fearing that they may lose what ever they are holding to,but remember the logic of the car and the bird said here,if at all we have to walk towards prosperity and growth lets un clutch our self so that we can move like a flowing river and not end up as a stagnant water.After all we are here Born to win and would not end up as losers

Short Term Memory loss

The strength of Human Beings is their power to remember,things events and contents and the weakness of Human Beings is also the same,Our  ability to remember things ,which is the source of our constant thinking process and the initial spark of all troubles.
Memory retention is being focused as a prerequisite for growth,knowledge enhancement and for taking you forward,Various schools of thought are focusing on tuning your left brain   to make you smart on verbal communication skills and to tap you logical and analytic strength or by training the right brain which is cabable of being creative and artistic,we also keep pushing our kids for these classes, thinking that it would give them an edge over others if their memory skills are good.
Well all of us really enjoyed the Blockbuster "GHAJINI" where the HERO was descript as a medically ill person Diagnoised for short term Memory Loss.We could sympathize with him for his pathetic condition,But we rarely recollect that all of us  poccess' This short term memory loss.Really,you will agree with me,when I go a bit more Further and say that,our memory loss is turning into a goldmine for others for their spurning business and popularity.
Well still not clear?I guess all of us would be spending considerable time in front of the TV,AND WOULD DEFINITIVELY watch at least one or two reputed english News channels,Have you ever noticed that  the news item which is debated   in full form  today, becomes extinct,on the next day,It leaves no trace,For example on day suddenly all channels talk about sachins achievement,which gets replaced by highlights of ramdev like wise every day the topic keeps changing,we just go to bed carrying forward this, only to see that the next day its someother  x y or z,and we just forget about these top stories within 24 hours ,but never think about our short term memory loss.
Incidently I am prompted to narrate a small story,which I heard when I was young.Once there lived a family of three, A father,Mother and Son.The father and mother being illiterates wanted their son to be educated and grow up in strature.However the  SON was not interested in studies,not to dissapoint his parents,everyday he used to go to school,but take a diversion and spend his time chit chatting with others and return home predending as if he had been to School,But how long can such things hold water,A
test to his notoriousness came in the form of a telegram.As all other parents going tensed on receiving a telegram the mother was tensed too on receiving one. she handed it over to her son to read and convey the contents.The son who did not know how to read it, tossed it upside down a few times and started to cry,The mother guessed that the telegram contained some sad news and joined her crying son only to be joined by her husband.Seeing this the neighbours wanted to know what was the issue and one persons read ouut the telegram,which only said the ladies brother would be arriving shortly.
The boys behaviour came to light and the distressed parents decided ,enough is enough,and planned to get him married off So that atleast marriage would instill SOME responsibility.and He he was wedded to his relative's daughter.After a grand wedding the bride and bridegroom were invited to the in-law(girls)s house for the customary feast The guy was putting up a smart face to hide his ignorance And wanted to act smart,So when ever any delicacy was given to him,he was simply turning it down saying he did not like it,even without tasting them.
The mother in law was really worried and in an attempt to make him eat some thing she had prepared kozukatai(vinayakars favourite snack),when his wife carried it, as usual he said che chi i dont like such stuff take it away.However destiny was cruel, the fellow was sleeping adjacent to the grinder which was used to make the stuffing for the kozukattai,the smell of jaggery,cardomom and ingredients was simply spreading a devine smell,unable to contain himself he tried to taste the left over in the grinder and was really cursing himself for having missed eating them.
The next morning ,they were retutning back. while his wife took to a cart, he decided to walk the distance,but before taaking leave from his mother in law,he enquired what was the snack that was offered to him called,and she said it was kozukattai,Not to forget this name he kept walking the distance uttering,kozukzttai,kozukattai.......(Remember when we were young your mother would send you on an errand to buy e few things from the adjacent shop, and we used to cover the distance repeating the items what we had to get)Only to be intercepted by a small gutter which he had to cross,incidentally there was a stranger on the other side , who was also to cross over THE gutter and while crossing just to make it easier he uttered "HAI TERI BACHA" and jumped across and had a safe landing.Our freind too wanted to cross the gutter using the same technicqe ,so he too crossed it yelling "hai teri bacha" and landed safe,now the man was walking towards his house  uttering, hai teri batcha,hai teri batcha........( he had forgotten kozukattai)
(short term memory)landed home and was happy to see his wife already there.And like all other husbands,the moment he entered his house, he announced his wife that he wanted "hai teri bacha" for snacks, immediately.The poor wife said she doe not know any snack like that,but this man insisted that he should IMMEDIATELY have that snack,the more the wife denied that she did not knoe such an item,he got furious and started punching her,hearing this commotion the neighvbours came for her rescue and seeing her condition,exclaimed why have you beated her like this see her whole body is swollen up like kozukattai.
Hearing the word kozukattai again,the man knew what was the issue he said yeah thats it I want" kozukattai".
well the wife prepared kozukattai and their story continues on,but what was the essence is that we too are switching from one personality or topic to the other and forget what are our core issues one day we keep utterring corupuption,corupption....just to be replaced 2G,2G......adarsh,adarsh......poverty line,poverty ,Tsunami    swine flu..........elections,elections......AND AS A WHOLE THIS SHORT TERM MEMORY LOSS OF OURS IS TURNING INTO ADVANTAGE TO OUR DECSION MAKERS..WHO ARE ALSO CONVENIENTLY SWITCHING OVER FROM ONE ISSUE TO ANOTHER

SPORT(IVE) MANAGERS

Every dawn brings to us  a lot of Happiness and Apprehension, Happiness since we have yet another day to live,APREHENSION  fearing  HOW IT IS GOING TO END.Often we keep grumbling and accusing as follows.
Oh that fellow really played a nasty game
I should have known his moves, than I would have handled this situation better.
I should't have made that strike,
These are some of the sentences what we utter when we find ouselves on a losing ground.
and there are no schools to equip us to meet these challenges.Many times we keep asking our self.How Can we Handle our jobs better? well I guess yes We can become better ,Provided we too know some sport.And the rules of the games, which would make our life filled with success.

Reading every bit of stuff that appear on Dailies,Magazines and News papers,has become my cherished hobby. I invariably  spent lots of time when i see an Advertisement on the restuarants,My mouth starts watering just LOOKING   at the spread over there, spicy chickens,fried fish ,splendid Briyani(sorry veg folks)
than I move on to the next attractive  page ,which carries different sales on dress material/accessories,hand bags cosmetics,andi start   imagining how it would look had I been the person owning it, A thousad cat walks and imaginary peeps into the mirror flashes before I skip to the next Item,Mobiles,various models with Different EMI(at timesI think why this emi should not be the price of this item, very very greedy)Than, comes shoes/toys, chappals etc. Not to miss I spend considerable amount of time into the orbituary page, sympathizing for the lost souls, feeling more pity and miserable if the person dead is younger than  Me,Trying to appreciate the love what they would have given, to deserve such fond rememberance.Well when you can see I give equal importance to any stuff that appears-on the papers,You should have also guessed that I would have devoted some time on the jobs/wanted colourms and did a small Analysis what various companies and corporates are looking for in Prospective candidates,who are  to lead them to Excellence at Managerial levels.

well the First attribute required was a mentioned as sound Education, that too with extraordinary ,grades,skill communication skills, age and experience, etc are indicated but rarely no one wants to know whether you have any intrest in sports and what are the games that you play(unless its a sports quota recuritement)
It might not be out of place to state that Generally people who have a proffesional edge in sports ,do not fair very well in academics,Hence most of the Managerial slots are occupied with people of excellence academically but with little exposure to sports.Because kindly look down whats required from all of us in an organisation.
Participation:Every company feels that each one of us have to be in the game participating,and not as fence sitters ,watching others play,hence the first attribute is to have a person who can willingly come forward and participate
Targets&Goals:Every organisation Moves forward  is an attempt to achieve its target and goal,and in turn this is transfered as individual targets and goals,Individuals failure to recognise targets and the lacking in spirit to chase the set target leads to the under performance of the organisation(every one in any org should feel that he has to run those extra runs to achieve sucess).
Team work&Spirit:Many times we tend to be spending much of our time trying to resolve, conflicts arising within a team between  two individual ego ,who are good individually but fail as a team.HAD THEY had knowledge of some games they would understand that No game is won by individual efforts, but only thro collective contributions.
Sucess/win:Every company/corporate would always  like to suceed in all their endevours this is the spirit what has to be in all of us no one is born to fail,so also you do not start participating in a game thinking you would lose, so let us play our roles with a positive punch.
Strategy: success comes not only with expertise and hard work it also requires correct strategy,do not run when you have to walk,do not make all your options known to every one,reserve some thing to surprise your boss and team mates.
Planning&Prediction:we should be aware that Many games are simultaneously played around us,some times we are playing along with them ,and at times we are used as coins for other peoples games, hence always plan and be ahead with at least three or four moves,Keep predicting in advance and play defense when required.
Well these are just a few jargon's used in daily life,and at times we feel we are into a losing battle,only because we fail to know the rules of the games that is being played,hence in my perception, The first attribute that any Manager should have is to be a sportsmen(of course you can sportively take missed challenges too).
Well you can also Recollect that Most of the business magnets,spend lot of time relaxing and cooling their heels playing one sport or other,But little do we know that they are taking their training classes,formulating their sucess strategy

AN INSIGHT ON "PETERS(PEOPLES)PRINCIPLE"

Every one of us,start our life, like any one else,we crawl at 6 months,stand at 10 months,speak when we are one year old and follow a set pattern,and we call them mile stones ,and as time march past miles ahead we turn back to see that we are no more the same people with similar milestones, some have surpassed us ,while certain people,are staggering  finding some means to become a sucess
Even within an organisation, we find that people with like qualifications and similar intelligent quotient, perform differently,ever wondered what could be the reasons?why we have climbed the ladder up, while some one is still  stuckdown in an hierarchy .or vice verse.
I was recently reading a book by Dr.Lawerance J.peter and Raymond Hull,where he has also been perturbed about this major issue "Why thingSsalways go wrong "made a wide study on various items of issues in an Hierarchy and formulated his theory THE PETER PRINCIPLE.
Well the high lights of his theory are just produced below for the knowledge enhancement of every one.:
In a hierarchy every employee tends to Rise to his level of incompetence
That is every employee would be considered for promotion to the next level,,till such time that he reaches INCOMPETENCY.,SO IF ANY ONE IS STRUCK at the level of PEON,AND NOT considered for further promotion as a clerk.,he has reached his level of incompetence, so it goes,for a teacher to headmaster/principal/manager to gen. manager,Asst director to director, MD TO CMD,Further it may so happen that every one in that particular organisation would have attained the level of incompetence.and what ever little the organisation,is doing might be due to a few competent people still available. well we can relate this to our real life stories in our field of work .and Smile at what Peter has said.
Well even though the book deals with a vast serious issues which we encounter day in and day out. here was some very interesting observation made by the Author,which goes as follows,If we start plotting the profile of our staff in ant organisation, the distribution would,turn out as a bell curve ,where a major portion of the people would fall within the range of average competence,beyond this we have people distributed on either side as in competent and competent, Further beyond you have  a special group super incompetent and super competent(Pl see the fig done for your benefit)
Inference and practicality of the data
It is widely believed that bosses are not very comfortable working with these two category of people,and are more comfortable with the average competent ones.
the COMPETENT and incompetent people have  possibilities of getting fired and removed from the hierarchy's, However chances of a competent person getting remover/fired is much higher than an incompetent person getting fired, because bosses prefer incompetent persons,better than competent ones
Both super incompetent and super competent are not liked by the bosses and both of them stand great chances to be fired, and surprisingly both of them have equal chances to be removed unlike the upper model where,the in competent has a better chance of survival.
Well now go back to the hierarchy what you hold,now think about your chances of moving up(oh! you are still competent all the best and good luck).Also be prepared for being pushed out of the chain you see you are competent
If you have NO more levels to migrate, feel happy you have reached your level of incompetence,but you are still a preferred lot because of the logic stated above.
But the most important thing for all of us(including me) is to ensure that we get always plotted within the Average competent  range,see it is the safest parking lot for a peaceful career,And let us really thank Peter for this wonderful enlightenment

PARENTING??? PAMMPERING!!!

I have been thinking about parenting and brining up children for quite some time .And often confused about what good parenting means?,and it remains  a riddle, like the chick and egg, not knowing  which prompts what ,well guessing ?yes its just a process to asses whether all good parents groom good children, And whether all good children have wonderful parents .what  attributes define  parents as good and bad and what bench marks have to be drawn to adjudge a child as good/ bad.
Well let us see a few cases which have made headlines in the recent days,which can give us some glimpses of the topic under discussion
Case 1: A student of class 9 has stabbed his lady class teacher to death in the school premises,enraged since the teacher wanted to discuss his performance with his parents,what was more amusing is that this happened in a very conservative and cultured city like chennai.and not in any rural or ultra modern city.
Secondly it has happened in a private institution,unlike any government school,which we normally,relate to be a haven for all such misdeeds.
Third the boy was supposed to be a well pampered child at home,which defies the normal conclusion that he was a attention deprived child,and hence under depression..
Case 2 well the same news paper carried a cute looking boy's photo of standard XI,who had committed suicidesince he could not meet his parents expectation academically.
Here too the boy was studying in a institute of repute, parents were slightly critical on his performance,and the incident happened in chennai city .
Case 3 Competing with the above two news,here was yet another suicide of a girl of class IX  jumping from her terrace who scumbeled eled to injuries and this tim it was rather a very silly reason,she had a disagreement with her girl friends? and here too the school was a good one.
well all the three incidence are of equal concern ,because three valuable human life has been lost /robbed.But, while the first incident created a flutter,debate and sympathy the other two incident just lost its sheen,because of their merits.
Following the incident at case 1 lots of issues are being debated,And a complete astro/social/economical analysis has been made to find out, what could be the triggering rage that would have made a boy to commit a crime of this magnitude?
And the first reaction comming forth from public/ media was that The boy was a very very pampered boy by his parents,so is pampering and showing excess love and attention a negative attribute?which can  make people,mad?The next reason was that the teacher was critical on his performance,which required his parents  attention,and asked the boy to bring along his parent,the boy felt insulted ,demoralised with the class teachers initiative to correct him, But this is the mildest action what the teacher could do,which cannot be said to be wrong.The teacher was performing her job assigned well within the ambit, But why such a irrational response from the child for some rational actions.
well if we believe it was  due to excess  pampering and wrong parenting(failure  on the part of parents to imbibe good values,stress  goodness and better behaviour, to weigh pros and cons for any action and wrong parenting)or Due to excessive pressure from the school/teacher
If so is there any method to rationalize and say this much of pampering and this percentile of strictness if exercised than perhaps these children  would have grown  UP with a much better attitude?
well this just made me to think back on my childhood,where our parents never had any reservations in using the stick and kept piling up their abuses,when ever they felt my academic performance or conduct was not up to the mark.But we never turned into such aggressive beings Further with the number of children being more than 2 in each house, Personalised attention was very rare,which kept shifting to the youngest,and the eldest were added with the responsibility of taking care of young ones.

While this was the scene at home,we were not spared at school too,Teachers had all types of liberty to infuse discipline and to make children fall in line with academic requirements.No parent had the nerve to question any teacher against any corporal punishment or punitive methods used, in fact THE PARENTS left the job of moulding their children to the teachers.So it is an integrated effort of both parents and teachers to turn a child into a good child.

This principle has been accepted by me in bringing up my children,with an addition that they have to bear the brunt when ever i am in a foul mood following,a bad day in office.And of course having a cynical pleasure that Iam passing on,a portion of what I have received.But they have taken this correction in the good spirits, Because there has been a reasonable quota of strictness shown right from the beginning
But than every child is unique and every parent is unique too,we really do not have,any defined results or algorithms, which can be documented and said this is the best way of bringing up a child.But as quoted by Roger lewin "'we too often give children answers to remember ,rather than problems to solve" which is one reason  for such news ITEMS  to creep . and We  feel happy that our children are not like the ones stated above , which gives you a pep of a GREAT PARENT .

"online services" a bane!!....

Tomorrow even though I have a series of activities to do on my scheduler.I have fixed up that I will not handle, any thing else before I first book a railway ticket using the online sevice.

Well the time ticked 8.am and I was one amongst the many people who had logged on to the site to reserve a ticket on the tatkal quota.Hitting the site button I was sitting with expectation and. anxiety and praying my luck(for a ticket ultimately)but to get started with at least the login window, should open, after a long wait, my first level of computer game started, you see the rules for this game is too stringent It has every possibility to throw you out, on one pretext or other, so beyond expertise, luck is very very important, and after each,(level) wait, when I was proceeding to the next level, I was excited that I am going to successfully seal the deal.

well this is when some stupid message appeared saying I had hit a wrong button and hence my attempt is terminated, So I was again at the base waiting for the log in window, and this game of excitement and anxiety continued. where every time after 15 to 20 min I was logging on with reduced chances of securing a ticket, because the availability was c0ming down 58 to -8(waitlist).This is when I was reminded about the entertaining snake and ladder game which we used to play at our young ages, getting excited when ever you found a ladder only to be met with snake and sliding down, which coincided  with the Railway  reservation system.

Incidentally I was also amazed how I was literally used by the railways, to do their job of issuing a ticket for me, by making use of me as their staff, using my resources of computer, internet, mobile facility and taking away my productive time of an hour to just meet my demand of getting a ticket. And in this process the service provider for internet service has got his share of business, the credit card fellow has earned his charges and the railways have taken their charges, for no service renderded   by them except for providing an access to their server,( which means ultimately I have been indirectly made to pay much more, than the ticket cost, which has gone in as indirect gain for others(broad band charges,mobile charges,stationary,electricity,etc,etc).

Lets see how this system would have worked had I been to a manual counter, I would have been into a queue, made use of stationary of railway, used the services of their staff, computer and other resources and demanded other facilities like a seat to rest water in case of thirst, ventilation and air/fan and any other thing deemed to make a customer comfortable and happy. and beyond that would have had the right to express,my displeasure when the service delivery was not to expected level .And WOULD have  accomplished this job in no time.,My only inconvenience would have been to reach the nearest booking counter/or depute any one with this job, bearing a transportation charge, and the rest would have been borne by railways.

Taking a very cynical look, you would observe during this  period of time, irrespective of your status(employed/unemployed/studying).you have been either been reduced in status  or elevated in status and occupied the position of a booking clerk/computer operator.

Not only in the case of Railway reservation service,ANY OTHER ONLINE SEVICE, SUCH AS BANKING ,booking your air ticket,etc.etc  the story is the same.who are using this trump card of easy, instantaneous, hassle free ,service slogan and making us to  slog , to reduce their operational cost, maximize profits.

To conclude, I was reading a book, Rich dad Poor dad by Robert T. Kiyosaki,where he had quoted that “I don’t work for money!” “Money works for me”And if every person learns the knacks of making money work for them, instead of working hard to make money.richness and abundance would follow.So this is what is followed by these companies which is pushing them towards profits.And we are the innocent people working for them to make money