Heads you lose" Tails you lose too"

Have you ever wondered ,whats the best practice that we can use to keep our domestic help as we desire i.e as per our requirements. well i think the toughest thing ever possible is to manage them with our wits. This is an art which cannot be learnt, there are no fixed doctrines to deal with them, and above all i guess this topic is not covered under any management Mantra.There are fixed rules for regular workers the principle of carrots and stick is used on every one of us,whether you get a carrot or not,the thought of being reprimanded makes us to work as loyal and yours sincerely.On the contrary have you tried this on your domestic/personal staff, the moment you start giving them small small incentives, they guess you are a fool(ellicha vai)and you are taken for a six. the moment you want to be strict and talk terms,they just walk out, leaving you amidst of undone utensils.wailing child, soaked clothes and half cooked meal, so both ways you have your super day .
there should have been many people who have such experience but only dismiss discussing them ,cause you are rated very incompetent(not capable of matching the wits of an illiterate person).well this is when i compare myself to the similar situation what a chettiar faced some time back.Having undergone such humiliation the smart chettiar had the habit of having a written agreement signed.
It so happened that a man who had left his home in a scuffle with his dad landed up into the  chettiar's hand  who was looking up for a domestic help. the smart chettiar made a list of jobs that were to be attended to ,which read as follows
1Should feed,clean  bathe ,milk 1000 buffaloes what he possessed
2)should clean the meadow and make cow dung cake of the cattle's
3)assist the chettiars wife in her day to day errands
4)baby sit for chettiars child,while it cries
THE PAYMENT FOR THESE SERVICES WOULD BE  IN KIND "A STAY AT THE CHETTIARS HOUSE AND A FULL MEAL A DAY"
The threat being that if either of them the man or chettiar wanted to quit from this arrangement
,the party who breaks  the deal will suffer three burns with a  piping hot rod.and would have to pay 1000 gold
Both parties signed the deal each one thinking that they have struck an excellent deal, as days progressed the man found the job very tough and tiresome, but could not break and go for two reasons, still he had not reconciled with his dad,had nowhere to go and the biggest thing was the horror of taking those three Burns as per the agreement if he flouts.
Days rolled on and the mans father had gone sick on hearing that his son had left him efforts to sight him paved way,he at last heard about his where abouts thro hear say, so pursued his younger son to write a letter asking him to come back.On receipt of the letter the young man was worried over his fathers sick, overjoyed to receive a letter and at the same time scared to break the agreement for the fear of the punishment,so preferred to stay on with out responding.Since a long silence followed the younger brother decided to go in person and persuade his brother to return back ,so he searched and located his brother,was terribly moved to see the horrible work load and proportionate re numeration paid,he insisted that his brother come with him,but was surprised why he showed resistance only on persistent query he learnt about the bond.
 In an attempt to save his brother the other man offered to stay back,to continue with the job ,while his brother was permitted to pay a visit to his Father.This was agreed to by the chettiar.And work started for the young man who was not the same as his brother,who had decided to take chettiar for a task.Every day morning the man would take the cattles to the water spot,the moment the buffaloes near the water,he would,bring them back,saying you had enough of sight of water,to feed the cattle's the man used to collect 1000 stacks of grass or straw,cut using a blade which would not even meet a tooth requirement,and when ever the chettiar made any efforts to interfere,the Man would say,kindly check for yourself i have brought in 1000 stacks of grass(the chettiar had not specified what a stack mean),And for baby sitting he would see to it that he gives a hard pinch at the playing child, when it starts to cry,he would try pacifying it,now the chettiar found himself in a tight corner,his cattle flock was almost a bag of bones with literally no feeding,his money and wealth was dwindling due to poor returns as an effect of reducer output in terms of milk cow dung cake or what so ever.and any attempt to correct his servant would come with a reciprocation that he was not violating any condition laid in the agreement,the chettiar was ready to get rid of him but was reminded on the penalty clause the 3 soodu(burns) unable to cope up with him any further the chettiar decides to take him to his sisters house and leave him there calling it good riddance,.So makes his travel plan,getting ready with packed food and palakaram(eateries)for his sister packed in a pot,just to keep him off from eating the stuff he cautions him saying it contains insects such as snakes,lizard,frog etc and the duo sets off on their horse after Travellingr a considerable  distance chettiar decides to break journey and have his food and relax and resume ,so they alight near  a pond and park their horse, chettiar leaves the man guard of every thing and goes to wash himself in the pond, the notorious man uses this time to his advantage open the pot eats to his stomachs content,and than empties its content and fill it up with frogs,snakes and other insects from the pond and is waiting for his master to come and join.already tired and hungry chettiar opens his pot and puts his hand in only to be scared with its contents,the servant quids,why are you scared for the snakes and frogs that you had put?.The man has no answer, is just dumbed,so with no other go they start their journey,hoping to reach his sisters town soon .the house of his sister is at Stone throw distance unable to move even a inch,the master indicates the house and asks his servant to go to his sisters house and get him some lemonade or buttermilk to quench his thirst and hunger,the crooked servant instead insist that she make a syrup of tamarind and salt saying that was what has been insisted by his brother as the best remedy to kill his thirst,the sister who has always been obedient towards her brothers order does not want to defy so sends across the syrup.chettiar is amused seeing what is fetched,but the clever man states that it was his sister who offered it saying this was the best remedy to drive away fatigue,the man believes and drinks it,oh ho now a new problem is added the man has a terrible stomach upset due to this syrup so goes to a distance to relieve himself. The smart servant uses this opportunity and slashes away the horse's tail ,the horse gallops away with pain, this cunning man just digs up a hole putd the tail inside buried and yells chettiar,chettiar make it fast,the horse has sunk into the soil. the helpless chettiar runs back Hand both of them try to pull out the horse,only its tail comes out,so the last possession the horse too has gone.
now chettiar understands that enough water has flown, reaches his sister house his sister too notices that her brother's servant is horrible and suggest to get rid of him.But chettiar says its impossible,because if he sends him away he has to compensate with 1000 gold and also has to bear the 3 soodu. The sister says no other go gives him 1000 gold, the chettiar takes the punishment and their end the story,
so now can u see that the servant always have their way .however smart we are or what ever agreement we make,thats why i now yearn to have a humanoid which would sincerely do some thing to me

SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST

Every field has become highly competitive  and to achieve success  it require a lot of mathematics, management and  a gamut of marketing techniques . Every organisation  is reinforcing again and again on behavioral  and attitude change, customer  satisfaction,value addition,will power, confidence, entrepreneurship etc .etc. if you really have to survive

Challenges and competition , are so severe that you have to do something special  if you have to survive .yes every activity requires a unique selling point to push it across or to capture  recognition.While watching television our kids  do a better censoring in ensuring that even if u sit in front of the screen the content what you see is at their mercy,so while they were switching channels I had a glimpse of this song, even before I could capture a frame, it was out of my vision, my request to watch it  was turned down saying it’s a bore .However on my insistence I was allowed to see it and now I make it a point to watch this song which i guess you too  would be liking but after this  reasoning you might like it much better.

Well are you all guessing which is this number?.there is a song in the movie EASAN zilla vithu zilla

vantha kadhaiya nee kethitya,

well the first observation,the lady is a vendor on the beach side,with a good customer base you can see most of them are her loyal customers so she has already established customer satisfaction, the key criteria for retention

secondly, she does not want her clients to have a monotonous dining, hence wants to entertain then with a song to break the monotony Value addition

The song goes as a narration on her life so a content and message is available to admire

The song narrates the tough time she  had to under go, and u see without turning to extreme steps of ending her life she has turned into an entrepreneur(this is how big businessmen too have evolved) shows a positive attitude

In the event of her narration she becomes emotional, which is a natural instinct hence a few drops of tears and silence  we too relate to her Even thou its just momentary(drawing empathy)

 She is disturbed when the crowd which was enjoying suddenly becomes remorse and sad  and look at her with pity, she immediately regains her cool   her positive attitude not to fall prey to pity and self pity is explicit

She comes out of her sadness and starts dancing the crowd too is relieved to see her
 mood change and starts dancing cheerfully

Lastly we never guessed that she could give those fast dance movementt with her profile, but she could do it with confidence.
So beyond just making a song the director has seen that he give some management touch to draw the audience attention which is the unique selling point for this song.
well i do hope  by now it is evident that Management lessons are not drawn only in Rajni movies, but every where, we only miss capturing them.

Nalam nalam ariya aaval

Oruvar manathai oruvar ariya uthavum palam ethu! Looks like a riddle? yes I just thought I will kindle a bit of your yesteryears communication means, the most reliable, media of those days letters. Is’nt it years that we received a nice informative and concerning handwriting letters from our near and dear ones . Its at least six years for me the last one being from my dad wishing me a wonderful year ahead during 2006.writing letters,was/is an art and receiving letters is a bliss.i was atleast one person who wanted to constantly keep in touch with my dear one,I was one of the official communicators from home to others who were displaced on varying reason and it was a pleasure writing letters. To each one of them with the enormous changes that technology has brought in today such as the phone ,mobile and skype  which gives instantaneous communication. These devices may give us various advantages(for those who are bad writers),but it has erased the personal touch and the emotional quotient what a hand written  letter carried.

Prime time begins only after 7pm,WHERE  maximum TV channels are aired and maximum people watch. Our prime time those days were between 11 and 12.noon the slot during which the post man knocks, delivering letters.even if the man crossed your house we used to call him to confirm whether there were no letters .each house had a letter holder a poke stick to secure them, which in later years has been changed to letter pouches/wall hangers. the postal dept had a clear segmentation of the customer’s  needs and pricing, a poor mans need met through a postcard, not for long messages and completely transparent, the inland letters with a reasonable space only problem being all important matters got squeezed  in the folds as last minute additions, with limited confidentiality(you can read ¾ of the letter without opening)and the envelope for large scale users stationary was your choice, sometimes  colourful letter pads were used to impress the receiver

Let us not deny the fact that  reading a old letter is one of the  few things which doesn’t give you boredom even if repeated again and again. Letters really bridged the distances, the hand writing on the address block gave you a warm embrace  Bridging half the distance ,the way  you are(were) addressed with love and care would wipe out yet another 25%of your loneliness and the way your letter is concluded would, give you the morale and courage to go on for the days to come. APPA was an excellent  and prompt  writer,Letters had the strength to bring tears as you read down .MY DAD  always had a very affectionate and professional way of ending his letters  one with love and kisses (do our conversation over phones  end with loveit might end with a bye at the most).MY MOM  wrote letters very rarely but there was a lot of genuineness and care in her writing,her letters were mostly in tamil were a treasure.

recently I was reading a book DADY-LONG LEGS by jean Webster, and this book was the motivator to go back to the memories on letter writing. People who are accustomed to letter writing would enjoy the reading and you may not put down the book. please add this to your personal library.  I recommend all of you to present your kids with this book,it might drive away the inhibition and shyness what holds them back from writing letters, might be you would be surprised with a lovely letter from your siblings For the others who already have multiple mail ids please make an attempt  to type a few lines of your own and send it across instead of forwarding versions of some one else THAT WOULD DEMONSTRATE  WHAT THEY MEAN TO YOU

STRESS BUSTER

 Are we not living  in a periods UNTOLD STRESS, our day begins with lots of expectations and ends with disappointment   to make things worse  there is no channel (I did’nt mean the numerous tv channels) to let it out.and gets  worsen The series of serials(soaps) make our day even more dreadful.,where every heart is heavy with grief and no one to share to, well this is when I remembered. how wonderful it would be to have a marappachi boomai,   Some of us would have been the fortunate’s( or unfortunates)to have possessed one of these dolls the marappacci boomai, I said fortunate, because you atleast had this piece to play with, and unfortunate, because we never had the ,money nor luck to have those soft big plump teddies which are found even on road side shops today .well the advantage of a marappachi boomai, was it was made of wood, it was the cheapest and you can drape it with a saree and blouse or with dhothi and shirt out of unused rags collected from the tailor shops,. Sort of identified more with your practical life style, desi you can say.  The other option was to live with those plastic missi  boomai or doctor doll. which gave you very little scope for your imagination and creativity. cause they either came with a painted attire or they were just a single piece of mould .well I guess this intro for the Stress buster marappachi is enough.By now the guys and girls who had the opportunity to play with them would have recalled their part of life . AND WONDERING well how can this become a stress buster?

well here is a small story recalled .once upon a time there lived a brother and sister who were orphaned at  young age so each other had to complement the absence of their parent and lived a simple life by going to the nearby forest and by collecting some wood and twigs were making a living.A portion of the forest was prohibited for venturing saying that the fruits in those trees were poisonous(recall garden of eden) by and large people kept away from it, one day the girl with her curiosity going beyond control entered the prohibited area.,much to the resistance of her friends. she found the place wonderful with colourful flowers and fruits, she had a few fruits to consume, and this episode vanished as days passed the girl found that there were some abnormal changes in her and one day she gave birth to a baby girl(courtesy the fruit she had). The girl was scared to have become an unwed mother, so she took the extreme step of hiding the child in a bundle of clothes in a corner of the house and committed suicide by jumping into the well  in her house. The girl used to nurse the child and take care of her as a fairy mother. The brother who was not aware of these developments was terribly aggrieved on the sudden death of his sister and never knew the reason for her death. Years rolled by and the man(boy brother)decided to marry and brought home his new wed wife,  who was by nature a bad lady.  One day when the wife was in the process of cleaning the house sighted the child  in the corner.Already being a wicked lady, she took the child to a faraway place abandoned the child and returned home. The small girl was crying stranded on the street not knowing whats  in store for her. Incidentally  the man of the house, passed by  he saw the small child crying ,the child brought back reminiscence of his baby sister, so  he decided to take the child to his house, and bring her up. His wife was to take custody of the child.

 The lady was terribly annoyed to see the imp back so she started to ill treat the girl in her own way by taxing her with lots of work, not giving enough food to eat and abusing her throughout the day. The only consoling fact was the small love what she got from her uncle(maternal.)Every day when the man used to set out to work the girl used to ask him for a marappachi  boomai,and when he returned .    she used to expectantly see whether he has got her gift, the girl was upset every time  she found him coming empty hand, but the girl never failed to remind him about the marrapachi boomai. The man was really sorry that he was forgetting this in his daily chores, so one day he knotted his handkerchief so as to remember to fulfill the girls wish. Fortunately that day he saw the knot while returning home and purchased a marappachi boomai for the girl from the market. The baby girl was overjoyed and never parted with the doll. But the man was interested to see what was the way in which the girl proposed to play with her doll. when the lights were put off and everyone went to sleep a feeble voice was heard whispering something, so the man sharpened  his ears to overhear  what was being  spoken   the  girl was talking to the marappachi boomai, telling it time and again thoogathey marappachi,etha kelu marappachi(don’t sleep listen to me)and what she was telling was the life  story of her mother and uncle and how she was being ill treated by the lady of the house. Every thing became clear to the brother and the mysery of his sisters death too was solved . with renewed bondage he and the kid lived happily thereafter. Well in todays busy schedules each one of us have our own burdens to bear and we hardly have a patient ear to listen to our joy and sorrow hence I suggested ,lets have a marappachi bomai, its cheap, maintenance free ,no need to scrub and wash. Besides these it’s easy to handle, doesn’t break and we need not bang our heads with frustration, the doll can take .it. Above all you have a nice goodnight tale for your kids to pass on. 

well if people have started reading this with expectations of a few  tips to keep your worries at bay, well   listen to soothing music, sing aloud  even if it sounds weird, dress up to make your day, make some one happy every day,  thrust in god.  and of course washing clothes and spending a whole one hour in the bath room  is really a wonderful way of releasing your stress(put all you anger pressure and might on the clothes)you get a wonder ful laundry done

The zahir

My all time  attraction is a fascination  for books  and my latest attraction is that of books written by Paul coehlo,thou late i am convinced that i am not
 in the list for those millions who are yet to read some of his writings.
having been introduced to the routine authors  like Sydney Sheldon,Ayan rand, Robert ludlum Irving wallace,Thomas hardy and so  on trying a new author was never on my agenda ,seeing a book of coehlo never stirred a feeling even to flip it in the stands to have a prelude on what it contains.
 Fortunately I had the opportunity  to read the Alchemist his best seller as the first book which  introduced  me to a new horizon of writing, rather  reading I should say and this just happened accidentally, appa was in possession of this book and during one of his visits to to my house he missed carrying it back. with his possessiveness
he was insisting that I return the book so I had to locate it and also restore it to the owner and in turn the book became a treasure, till such time it is returned back. So in the process I had the pleasure of reading it. I should say that it was indeed, knowledge enhancement and a completely different experience. The first book being his best made me now to go in search of his books and in the rounds it was  Zahir . the author himself has given many meanings for the word Zahir. but confined to the most appropriate thing relevant to his subject of discussion  in that book A thing or person or a feeling which occupies your mind and which you  can never tend to forget. Well  it may be a misconception to say that no such  thing occupies our mind space  . Because all of us  have a few thing dear to our heart (many if YOU are too obsessed)on my way to  office today with thoughts wandering I crossed a cycle stand with my blurred vision I wanted to do a fast scan to see whether a ladybird pink coloured cycle is available well this was my daughters cycle which was stolen some time back, but for some time now invariably whenever I sight a heap of cycles at any place I am inclined to see whether I would find it .for now this is my zahir. yet another thing which is hard to vanish from my mind is my philip transistor what dad presented to me when i was in college.
WELL this piece became my obsession for all days rain or shine.It was a companion which remained in my hand all the time or was by my side. when I was I college,listening to songs and going for a short stroll after our dinner  was a new trend .Our  group was the trend setter for this. many people started to go in for handy transistors (a small radio, for the info of younger generation). well i do not know how dad picked up this piece it was an olive green one with its rear side with black. This was my first item in green I guess. And  might be this colour has an influence on me that I get carried away with anything in green. It became more dear to me when I was at home after my college days . I remember it was some special day and people had gone to  chennai to see the some one The house was under my charge I was on some work and the transistor was well within my vision ,providing me with background music just a flick of time I found it missing.  it was the handy work of some people working at home . I spent several hours and days searching for  it in vain I had many dreams in which i would unearth it but It always remained as a dream .but this again remains as a zahir which i can never afford to forget well I know by now each one of you have sighted your zahir and started assimilating memories of it,keep travelling with this thought process still  some thing more important overtakes it